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12-Sep-2016 10:34

In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about the ISFJ, ISTJ, INFJ and INTJ personality types and how they look when they are healthy.

Final episode in the four part series on healthy expressions of all the types.

So here are a few tips if you are dating an INFJ personality type.

TIP: Read this book which has 2000 questions you can ask your partner.

Prime Minister and general Wellington: "Whatever enthusiasm [an army feels is] the result of the example set [by] the head of the army." Wellington: "The word of an English officer is a sure guarantee." [Explaining why he broke with Britain's Spanish allies:] Wellington: "They are really children. I cannot say that they do anything as it ought to be done." [Responding to accusations against him:] Wellington: "I [trust that the issue] will not be made the subject of that vague and general sort of discussion which sometimes takes place ...

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However as people who are deeply interested in making things work, INFJs can make for some of the most fulfilling of relationships.

Ross: "[Washington] was resolute and brave in action, moderate and restrained in his judgment, yet ...

ferocious in his rare anger." Richard Brookhiser: "[Washington had won] a war for independence and then gone home. President (R) and Supreme Commander of the Allied Forces during WW2 [On leading the U. Army during WW2:]Eisenhower: "This is a long tough road we have to travel. Fake reputations, habits of glib, clever speech, and glittering surface performance are going to be discovered." Eisenhower: "[Children should contribute] to a family's essential survival and happiness. robbed of the opportunity to do genuinely responsible work." David M.

Responsible, organizing Efficient and practical Take things seriously, expect others to do this also Traditional and conforming May not be emotionally available, can hold rigid points of view Like formal and informal acknowledgements- cards and 'thank you' Under stress: may withdraw, push too hard to get things done Best types for a relationship: ESTJ, ISTJ, INTJ, ISTP, ESTP Possible types for a relationship: ENTJ, INTP, ENFJ, INFJ, ISFJ, ISFP, ENTP Least likely types for a relationship: ESFJ, ESFP, ENFP, INFP Percentage of the US population: 12-16% Logical, realistic- natural trouble shooters Quiet and analytical observers Can be detached and overly pragmatic Can be uncomfortable dealing with their emotions Occasionally seen spontaneous, playful side Like to be acknowledged for their problem-solving capabilities Under stress: can feel trapped, move impulsively Best types for a relationship: ESTJ, ISTJ, ENTJ, ESTP Possible types for a relationship: ESFJ, ISFP, INTJ, ISFJ Least likely types for a relationship: ISTP, ESFP, ENTP, INTP, ENFJ, INFJ, ENFP, INFP Percentage of the US population: 5-7% Enthusiastic, hands on, adaptable realists Enjoy real-life experiences, new activities and challenges Happiest when they are in the moment Friendly, talkative and outgoing Can be too eager for the next experience Want to be respected for their need for freedom Under stress: may become excessively impulsive Best types for a relationship: ISTJ, ESTP, ISTP, ESFP Possible types for a relationship: ESTJ, ISFP, ENTJ, ENTP, INTP, ISFJ Least likely types for a relationship: ESFJ, INTJ, ENFJ, INFJ, ENFP, INFP Percentage of the US population: 5-7% Great talkers with strong opinions Dependable and responsible Find comfort in family routines and traditions Organized and orderly, may try to control their partner Can be inflexible and impatient Want to be acknowledged for keeping things running smoothly Under stress: may become hypercritical and controlling Best types for a relationship: ISTJ, ESFJ, ISFJ, ENTJ, INTJ, ISTP Possible types for a relationship: ENTP, INTP, ESTP, ESFP, ISFP Least likely types for a relationship: ESTJ, ENFJ, INFJ, INFP, ENFP Percentage of the US population: 10-12% Strong need to belong and to have harmony Very good with details and the here-and-now Trust the lessons of the past, rather than try new things Amazing command of the facts Do not like confrontation Need to be appreciated for their contributions Under stress: can become rigid Best types for a relationship: ISFJ, ENFJ, ESTJ Possible types for a relationship: ESFJ, ESTP, ISFP, INFJ, INFP, ESFP, ISTJ, ISFP Least likely types for a relationship: ENTJ, INTJ, ENTP, INTP, ENFP Percentage of the US population: 9-12% Gentle, sensitive, compassionate Down to earth, prefer action to words Modest and reserved Can take a long time to get to know Hide their vulnerability behind an air of detachment Want a deep and intimate connection with their partners Under stress: can become passive and withdraw Best types for a relationship: ESFP, ISFP Possible types for a relationship: ESTP, ESTJ, ESFJ, ISTP, ENFJ, INFJ, INFP, ISFJ, ISTJ, ENFP Least likely types for a relationship: ENTJ, INTJ, ENTP, INTP Percentage of the US population: 5-7% Enthusiasm for the world of real-life experiences Energetic and fun-loving, practical Spontaneous and flexible Can be frustrated by rules and regulations Very outgoing, "people people" Special concern for children Can show a lack of commitment or seem impulsive Under stress: may become excessively impulsive, over commit Best types for a relationship: ESTP, ISFP Possible types for a relationship: ESTJ, ESFJ, ISFJ, ESFP, ENTP, ENFJ, INFJ, ENFP, INFP Least likely types for a relationship: ISTJ, ISTP, ENTJ, INTJ, INTP Percentage of the US population: 6-9% Care intensely about people; generously support them Desire harmony- this is essential to their well-being Take their work seriously, think that others should also Traditions are important; as are family events and holidays Can be comfortable as leaders Can be seen as intolerant (based on their clear sense of right and wrong) Under stress: can become excessively emotional, see only the negative Best types for a relationship: ESTJ, ENFP Possible types for a relationship: ISFJ, ESFJ, ENFJ, INFP, ISFP, ISTP, ESFP Least likely types for a relationship: ESTP, ENTJ, INTJ, ENTP, INTP, INFJ, ISTJ Percentage of the US population: 10-12% Deep concern for people and relationships Live for insight and imagination Love of learning Deeply concerned with fellowship and harmony; caring and compassionate Concerned with the growth of others Idealists at heart; value trust in relationships Can be seen as stubborn about their own correctness Under stress: may be surprisingly critical, can become self-absorbed Best types for a relationship: ENTP, ENFP, INFJ, INFP, ENFJ Possible types for a relationship: ISFJ, ESFP, ISFP, ENTJ, INTJ, INTP, ISTJ Least likely types for a relationship: ESTJ, ESFJ, ESTP, ISTP Percentage of the US population: 2-3% Skilled communicators Often idealistic Harmony in relationships is important May not be able to get their own needs met Excited by new ideas and possibilities Creativity is important; artistic activities Don't tread on their values- they will bite you Under stress: can become outwardly critical of others Best types for a relationship: ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ Possible types for a relationship: ISFJ, ESFJ, ESFP, ISFP, ENTP, INTP Least likely types for a relationship: ESTJ, ISTJ, ESTP, ISTP, ENTJ, INTJ Percentage of the US population: 4-5% Love to talk about what is going on in their lives Will encourage their mates to grow Need to feel encouragement Don't like to say it when their feelings are hurt Tend to withdraw to process hurt feelings in private Need to hear how much they mean to someone Like spontaneous demonstrations of love and respect Under stress: may have difficulty saying no and take on too many projects Best types for a relationship: INFJ, INFP, ENFJ, ENFP, ESFJ Possible types for a relationship: ENTJ, ENTP, INTJ, INTP, ESFP, ISFP Least likely types for a relationship: ISTJ, ESTJ, ISTP, ESTP, ISFJ Percentage of the US population: 6-8% Strong desire for harmony Love to talk with and learn from others Exceptional people skills Make decisions based on personal values Idealists who need active people contact Exude charm, but can overwhelm others with too much enthusiasm Under stress: can become rigidly narrow, emotional and irritable Best types for a relationship: ISFJ, ENFJ, ENTJ, INFJ, ENFP, INFP Possible types for a relationship: ESFJ, ESFP, ISFP, INTP, ISTJ, ENTP Least likely types for a relationship: ESTJ, ESTP, ISTP, INTJ Percentage of the US population: 3-5% Have assumptions about the way things could be (strong opinions) Need to be around other competent people Avoid interpersonal conflict, but love a spirited debate Can need to feel in control, and be inflexible Can appear to be challenging and insensitive (generally not true underneath) Tend to avoid emotional risks, tend to keep thoughts and insights to themselves They may appear stubborn Under stress: may become over-structured; paralyzed by seeking perfection before taking action Best types for a relationship: ESTJ, INTJ, ISTP, ENTJ Possible types for a relationship: INTP, INFJ, INFP, ENFP Least likely types for a relationship: ESFJ, ISFJ, ESTP, ESFP, ISFP, ENTP, INFP, ENFJ Percentage of the US population: 3-4% Flexible and adaptable Want to make sense of concepts, and the world Logical and analytical- want others to be logical May have great powers of concentration Like abstract and symbolic thinking Often non-traditional May be seen as aloof; out of touch with the world Under stress: may feel overwhelmed and misunderstood Best types for a relationship: ENTP, INTP, INTJ Possible types for a relationship: ESTJ, ISTJ, ESTP, ENTJ, ENFJ, INFJ, ENFP, INFP Least likely types for a relationship: ESFJ, ISFJ, ISTP, ESFP, ISFP Percentage of the US population: 5-6% Excited by possibilities, anything new Eternal optimists Value knowledge and competence Gregarious, sociable; look self-confident Tend to view people in an objective manner, so they can appear insensitive May argue for the sake of argument Under stress: may take on too many projects, drive themselves to exhaustion Best types for a relationship: ENTP, INTP, INFJ Possible types for a relationship: ESTJ, ISTJ, ESTP, ESFP, ENTJ, ENFP, INFP, ENFJ Least likely types for a relationship: ESFJ, ISFJ, ISTP, ISFP, INTJ Percentage of the US population: 4-7% Good at analyzing and bringing order Logical Big picture thinkers Energetic planners and builders Value competence and intelligence Hold themselves to high standards Confident and assertive Under stress: may become hypercritical of themselves and others Best types for a relationship: ESTJ, ISTP, ENTJ, ENFJ, INTJ Possible types for a relationship: ISTJ, ESTP, ENTP, INTP, INFJ, ENFP Least likely types for a relationship: ESFJ, ISFJ, ESFP, ISFP, INFP Percentage of the US population: 3-5% Sources: "Looking at Type: The Fundamentals" Charles Martin, Ph. Center for Applications of Psychological Type, Gainesville, FL 1997 "Just Your Type" Paul D.

Tieger and Barbara Barron-Tieger Little, Brown and Company, Boston, MA 2000 To find out your type, and to get more information on what type is the best potential fit for you, as well as what you bring to a relationship, contact Jess Dods at 413-977-9273, or email at [email protected] also works with couples, on the phone or in person, to identify the strengths and challenges of a relationship, based on your personality preferences and the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator.Showing up as our best self doesn’t mean fitting a stereotype. Introverted Judgers – ISFJ, INFJ, ISTJ, INTJ ISFJ – ISTJ ISFJs are more open to variance and individuality because they are focused on the needs of people.



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