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Q: I've been seeing this girl and we've really been hitting it off. But my gut reaction is to ghost and never look back—I don't want herpes! – Jason, San Antonio A: Finding out your partner has herpes can be a bombshell at any point in the relationship. But it is not nearly as unique or earth-shattering as you think it is. I know there a lot of thoughts and anxieties swirling in your head—about your partner’s health, about your health, about your partner’s fidelity, about your future (or lack thereof) with your partner—and we’ll get to all that. My head tells me to handle this like a mature gentleman.If you’ve been physically intimate, freaking out was probably your first reaction (Do I now have herpes? Then come the other questions: Is herpes a deal breaker? But first, let’s get straight on what herpes is and what it isn’t.Are you stupid to continue a relationship with someone who has herpes? There are two viruses that people talk about when they talk about herpes: Herpes Simplex Virus 1 and Herpes Simplex Virus 2, or HSV-1 and HSV-2. Marie Claire: How has having a STI affected your dating life? One in every six people between the ages of 14-49 have it, and the majority don't even know (! To help us demystify the experience, we spoke with herpes-positive blogger Ella Dawson, 23, to tell us about what really happens when you date with the STI.HSV-1 is the one that usually causes cold sores around your mouth and lips.
If you test positive, and your partner is positive... Since you cannot pass the virus to someone already positive, then you can both enjoy a worry-free sexual intimacy.2. Maybe ask them to tell you more about the virus and what it's like to live with it. Don't get sexual when your partner has "The Talk" with you. Many people have long term relationships with a herpes partner and NEVER GET THE VIRUS. But, there's still that chance of getting the virus if you are dating someone with herpes.In this day and age, focus on these nice CHARACTER QUALITIES rather than the little virus. But also go do some searches on Google and start learning about this virus. Your love will be more powerful and more meaningful. This dramatically reduces the chances of transmission.